Euphoria? Indulgence? Stupidity?

Today I had the opportunity to visit my school again for some work and it turned out to be whimsical experience. Well, emotionally, at least.
The moment I set foot in the school, I was overwhelmed with feelings I cannot put into words. It was like being extremely joyful and sad at the same time. Joyful because there I was, once again, back at the place that made me. Among hundreds of kids some of who will maybe someday turn out to be like me. I was safe. I was home. Sad, because I would never truly be back there, my time there had ended. I will never be I child again, I will never be able to play in that uniform again.
A lot of questions sprang up in my mind
'Is this real?'
'When did I grow up?'
'When did I get used to not coming here everyday?'
'Why am a not here anymore, why am I not in that uniform like those hundreds of kids, playing carelessly?Why am I not one those kids?'
'Were the fields, the tables always this small?'
'When did I become so okay with growing up?'
'Will these kids someday feel what I'm feeling? Do they do the same stuff we did in school?'
'When will I come back here?'
'What would it take for another 10 years of school?'
'Is this a dream? will I wake up?'.....

This was such a strange experience. Melancholic euphoria. Or just rewarding indulgence? Or just sheer stupidity? I was there, I was home, I was elated and I was sad. But this stupid grin was smeared across my face. It was utter bliss. I was stumped. I was overwhelmed.
Life I tell you.....